Toaster Bath

Toaster BathToaster Bath began life as an illegitimate child in the mountainous backwoods of Bryson City, North Carolina, deep in the heart of Appalachia. After having been the drummer in several bands that folded as a result of either giant egos, sexual intrigue, or alcohol poisoning, Toaster Bath decided that he would try to write his own music. The only problem with that was that he had no fucking idea what he was doing. Several cases of beer and a failed romantic relationship with a closet lesbian later, he managed to produce [Sic], which is okay, I guess. I’ve heard better stuff, but it’s really not bad for a hick from Bryson City. Thanks to (mostly unwarranted) encouragement from friends and acquaintances, he decided to keep going with not only the music, but the beer and the tragically doomed romantic relationships, too.

And thanks to the fact that his uncle is the CEO of Seven Moths Records, our fine friend with an IQ of 82 has an outlet for his musical outpourings, regardless of what they sound like. Thankfully, the idiot-savant actually comes up with epic electro-rock brilliance on occasion.

Not so long after he was finished with [Sic], young Mr. Bath managed to lose a fiancée and drink himself into a dysthymic disorder, so he thought it might be a good idea to record an album about some shmuck who lost his fiancée and drank himself into a dysthymic disorder. The results of this happy impulse are what is now known as June, which came out, strangely enough, in June.

Afterwards, old Toaster Bath has kicked the fire water and now finds happiness on a healthy diet of O’Douls and Prozac, and he’s doing just fine. He’s even back to applying himself assiduously to learning just what all those knobs and buttons on the com-pu-ter do.

Unfortunately, our strange son of the rural woods started having nightmares about the apocalypse that just would not go away. Those pesky voices in his head even came back and started ranting about the end times. He thought they were just the alcohol talking before, but now he’s convinced God is really talking to him about the end of days. So, he did what he always does and wrote a bunch of songs about it. He managed to threaten Seven Moths founded Michael O’Shea (who is, unfortunately, his court-ordered guardian) with legal action if he didn’t produce his album, so it actually sounds pretty spiffy this time around. And now Toaster Bath is pleased to be releasing his EP End of Days on Valentine’s Day 2015. Let’s hope someone listens to it and he doesn’t drop the toaster.